tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-90210947899180635302024-03-05T20:20:15.954-08:00The Daddy ExperienceThe Story and Info for Tommy Galan, Improviser, Clown, Husband and Daddy.Tommy Galanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00724154249560715612noreply@blogger.comBlogger116125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9021094789918063530.post-8800268379054200602017-10-26T21:40:00.000-07:002017-10-26T21:40:40.047-07:00A Week Off Social Media<div class="MsoNormal">
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<span style="font-size: 12pt;">Off Facebook for a week and it’s a mixed bag of emotions and
experiences. For starters, the number of times I pick up my phone and swipe to
the Facebook app, as my brain says “Let’s check Facebook” followed by the thousandth
realization that it’s not there, is downright creepy. I grab for my phone
constantly and 9 out of 10 times, my brain seeks social media. And when I land
on the screen where my apps used to live, I don’t just leave the phone. I find
the next distraction. Weather, news, audio, games… It’s one thing to listen to
Pandora on a car ride, but reading the news while walking the dog is not
necessary and a poop hazard. The next step of this experiment will be to limit
my phone use overall because I can feel the phone pulling on my psyche almost
as much as I felt social media’s tractor beams.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjY-4aO8N7aPdWBeG-sUVgMmSjXt4DeclHfS1ZWGzBa3-LGxtu6UgcYv8a1EUnPNxDcoO6ufnZGiDFoDcc5m0pZTnASTm4Fzgj8cmURlgKRFzArt0Ho_KfRjMXGkiRWuk2yJNS3Q7fSu3q3/s1600/Screen+Shot+2017-10-20+at+5.18.41+PM.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: justify;"><img border="0" data-original-height="574" data-original-width="644" height="285" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjY-4aO8N7aPdWBeG-sUVgMmSjXt4DeclHfS1ZWGzBa3-LGxtu6UgcYv8a1EUnPNxDcoO6ufnZGiDFoDcc5m0pZTnASTm4Fzgj8cmURlgKRFzArt0Ho_KfRjMXGkiRWuk2yJNS3Q7fSu3q3/s320/Screen+Shot+2017-10-20+at+5.18.41+PM.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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The next realization is that I miss Facebook and I miss social
media, but not that much. I feel a little more isolated and lonely, but I’m
more aware of the richness of the in-person relationship as opposed to the
quick dopamine tickle of a social media alert. Nevertheless, I do feel the dreaded
Fear of Missing Out. I just need to keep focused on the fact that I’m mostly
missing out on a noise of chaos and/or celebration that doesn’t really matter to
my top priorities at the moment.<o:p></o:p></div>
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I have to make a confession. I’ve already found ways to
incorporate Twitter and Instagram into this blog. This is technically a social
media cheat, but let’s look at this in the spirit of the law rather than the
letter of the law. My goal is to not get caught up in the
topic/crisis/celebration de jour of the social media experience. So, with that
in mind, I unfollowed almost everyone. Now my Twitter feed is plugged into The Daddy
Experience so I can post short ideas and they can pop up here. I also created a
photos page with my most recent Instagram photos. If I can use these as tools
without being sucked into the void, I feel like I’m on the right track. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Family and close friends still want to know “what’s up with
The Galans,” so Nicole and I started a very small 23Snaps account. It allows us
to have a mini-FB with our very close family and friends who are actually
interested in seeing pictures of my kids without them being available to the ogling
public. I’ve debated going onto Facebook to remove pictures, but I’m still on
the fence. I haven’t missed posting, but I’ve missed sharing. This Daddy
Experience and 23Snaps should quell that without me needing to constantly be
tethered to everyone else’s thoughts.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Overall, I give disconnection with social media a 10 out of
10. That rating might change, but I doubt it.</div>
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For the last number of years, I woke up in the morning and
immediately grabbed my phone to check Facebook. With my recent exodus from
social media, there is no more Facebook or twitter or anything to view with my
morning eyes. Nevertheless, my conditioned mind still reaches for the phone and
turns it on immediately to be reminded that the apps are gone. But even without
the social matrix, there are still endless notifications. Little red dots with
numbers to indicate how many emails or text messages I’ve received between the
hours of midnight and 7am. There is almost no human who emails me during these
hours, but still, every morning, the reminders are there. There recollection
that I requested a nudge. Nudges from vistaprint, Disney, Guitar Tricks (I practice
guitar for about 3 weeks each summer), picMonkey, amazon and a cascade of other
entities that I’ve allowed to invade my inbox with shallow reminders.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhn4B8b5pKNCDsFfo3pJmx_PkBlhdY6LS4ujqcZvhXbgwavl1lOJmQ6jwbUiy03N7lOFkx2ZZ2sZBY8TNMitRu-sYeB5HxY0iXGiiSIba0IRWSHNRsaCjU5nmU4_cBguc2m627FUruxkqRs/s1600/Screen+Shot+2017-10-23+at+10.06.49+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="674" data-original-width="1168" height="184" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhn4B8b5pKNCDsFfo3pJmx_PkBlhdY6LS4ujqcZvhXbgwavl1lOJmQ6jwbUiy03N7lOFkx2ZZ2sZBY8TNMitRu-sYeB5HxY0iXGiiSIba0IRWSHNRsaCjU5nmU4_cBguc2m627FUruxkqRs/s320/Screen+Shot+2017-10-23+at+10.06.49+PM.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In the spirit of detaching from all of the noise, I’ve found
pleasure in the “unsubscribe” function at the bottom of these emails. There is
a service called Unroll.Me that will bulk unsubscribe you from all of your
reminders. Last month, they notified me that I had a whopping 913
subscriptions. My jaw dropped. How could this be? There is no way I could have
subscribed to all of these services and I don’t receive 913 unique emails each
month. At least I don’t think that I do. It’s extremely tempting to push the
button and let Unroll.Me do my dirty work, but I think it is important for me
to manually click that unsubscribe button at the bottom of each email as they
come in. I dug this hole and it’s my responsibility to climb out. I’ve become
so conditioned to react in the way the internet tells me to react, and I’ve
clearly allowed my brain to be rewired. However, what can be programmed in one
direction can certainly be unprogrammed, and then reprogrammed in a different
direction. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So, moving forward, I’m taking back my inbox. I’m manually
deleting all of the subscriptions that I don’t really need (which is most). I’m
reinforcing my decision one click at a time and forming new pathways in my
brain that favor simplicity, minimalism and detachment. Even more importantly, I’m
leaving my phone in the kitchen at night, so that my morning routine no longer starts
with a screen and a little red notification. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt;">Ridding my life of social media comes with the consequence
of throwing out the baby with the bathwater. All of the positives of social
media must be sacrificed to accommodate the benefits of burning social media to
the ground. Some family and friends are still interested in seeing my children
grow and there are plenty of fans of my San Diego performance career that would
like to know my schedule and thoughts on improv and clowning. That being the
case, I will use The Daddy Experience Blog once again to post updates and
pictures and thoughts that probably would have found their way onto social
media, without subjecting myself to the cesspool of negativity that repelled
me.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
New Car <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We bought a new car this past weekend! I hate buying cars,
but I love driving away with a new car. This weekend’s purchase wasn’t exactly
a new car, but it was so close. We used a website called True Car, which
filtered cars down to the price, year, make, model, mileage and location, which
resulted in a 2016 Dodge Grand Caravan with 32000 miles for $15,999 just about
25minutes from us. It was the first car we looked at, and we bought it. This
means we are idiots, but even idiots can luck out sometimes. It has a little
wear and tear, needs floor mats and a second key and a roof rack, but for
$10,000 in savings, it made sense.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicm1S_8VyjTECQ_p4EqfZ1NkrH1JuuvR-_OrjnJ4JrPaIBxtt5dH8iK9REhI1gTYkShx9dy5GEvTklfsrOR1kISYWB98VDaj5su4FNeVSOv_p0M1khufLwLv5iazoaxPOmz7wvii0gG2a1/s1600/IMG_9232.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="640" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicm1S_8VyjTECQ_p4EqfZ1NkrH1JuuvR-_OrjnJ4JrPaIBxtt5dH8iK9REhI1gTYkShx9dy5GEvTklfsrOR1kISYWB98VDaj5su4FNeVSOv_p0M1khufLwLv5iazoaxPOmz7wvii0gG2a1/s320/IMG_9232.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Used car salesman are just about as proud to represent their
stereotypes as are DMV employees. It is almost like they’re found in central
casting and only playing the roles of salesperson. He gave us a hard sell, but
I figured, how bad can a 2016 with 32000 miles be? I guess I’ll find out.
Either way, it was a necessity. The kids are getting bigger, and in 2018 we are
doing a mega-trip from July 1-31 to Vegas, Salt Lake City, Yellowstone, and the
5 Utah national parks. It should be extremely fun or a valid reason to have us
checked by psychiatrists. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHC_Mov76EaosCKy75M8QbhcV4UVooAyq32aeXMm9-cVTp-fa3B1TnaJ2nj9WD6VCwnRy5H6xT4Hc-d_6f4KCZqTZR_kb9Ie1jDYSFVHOLbtai1hKwXqKPZe7BhnHq1G0b0HmXXD-5uVOo/s1600/IMG_9213.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="640" data-original-width="480" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHC_Mov76EaosCKy75M8QbhcV4UVooAyq32aeXMm9-cVTp-fa3B1TnaJ2nj9WD6VCwnRy5H6xT4Hc-d_6f4KCZqTZR_kb9Ie1jDYSFVHOLbtai1hKwXqKPZe7BhnHq1G0b0HmXXD-5uVOo/s320/IMG_9213.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Oh yeah, we also had a baby last year. Another boy…Hunter.
He is a real sweet heart, but he sleeps in my bed and for the last year I’ve
been relegated to the couch. Kind of a dick move, but I love him anyway. Enough
updates for now…more to come.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
One thing that I can tell you, is when you make a
proclamation that you are leaving Facebook, many, many, many people will ask
you “Why are you leaving Facebook?” It’s almost like you are saying, “I’ve
decided to electively remove my leg from the calf down.” I get it. I’ve had
very close friends leave Facebook, and I’ve wondered if they were losing their
mind. Why would anyone want to turn their back on the best tool for connection
ever known to mankind. And aren’t I the biggest hypocrite by posting on a blog,
which if I remember correctly, has a Facebook page. Yeah, probably, but I have
my reasons, and anyone who cares to know can read them here. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Reason #1: The Attachment<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I left Facebook, but that is only part of the story. I
actually left all social media. As the eight years of Facebook have passed by,
I’ve realized I’m not just on Facebook. There is Instagram, and snapchat, twitter,
and musically and linkedIn and a slew of other social media sights that slowly
drag us into their bellies where we feel an obligation, or even an addition to
checking, posting, and contributing to a low return game that demands hours
each day, or at the very least a commitment to interrupt the real world with
segue into the digital.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In Buddhism, the first noble truth is that there is suffering.
The second is that suffering is a result of attachment. Social Media has not
made me happy. In fact, my attachment to Facebook and the like has done the
opposite. Social Media makes me suffer. It pulls me away from my children, my
wife, and the simplicity of life that makes life worth living. It’s become an addiction
of sorts and as I realize this truth, it becomes overwhelmingly obvious that
the drug of Facebook and social media has a very low return on investment. In
the last 8 years, I cannot say that I am a happier person because of by compulsive
attachment to social media.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Reason #2: The Division<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The world is becoming more divided. Social media cloaks
itself as the great unifier, but in reality, it divides us. When I joined
social media, I was amazed that I could connect with family and friends far and
away who I didn’t see or hear from in years. I never questioned, “Why?” Why
would I want to connect with people from my childhood. Why the constant need to
see pictures of the children of past girlfriends and mere acquaintances? Why do I need to see the family vacation
pictures from cousins whom I’ve never met? Why do I need to know all of your
pain and success, and why do you need to know mine? I absorb the pain as my
own, and become envious of the wins, which are only delivered as you prescribe.
This isn’t a true picture of reality, but my emotional experience knows no
difference.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I’ve realized that the closer I become, the further I get.
We aren’t meant to have tribes of 2000, and the blurred experience never gives
me clarity or perspective. Instead, what it provides is constant judgement. I
judge your positives and negatives as though I’m some barometer for the universal
condition, when in truth, we all suffer and we all succeed, but the social
media lens through which we view this causes us to grow farther apart. You
complain, I’m against you. You win, I’m against you. We are separate. I win or
lose, and you feel the same disgust whether conscious or not.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Reason #3: The Echo Chamber Illusion<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Quite simply, Social Media is an echo chamber. It reinforces
our own beliefs by exposing us only to the media, ideas, and perspective that
fits in our belief system. If a person or a company disagrees, we can choose to
block, unfriend, or not “like” that particular point of view. Once we “like” or
disengage, we continue to perpetuate a matrix in which we are continuously
echoed with the opinions of our own mind. This eventually convinces us that we
are correct and just and righteous in our own opinions. It eliminates subjectivity
and creates an environment of “disagree with me even 1% and you are the enemy.”
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In a world of 7 billion, surround yourself with the 1
million who agree with you 100% and you create a world of nearly 7 billion enemies. The snake is eating its own tail in so many
areas of society. Liberals fighting liberals. Conservatives fighting
conservatives. If you don’t tow the exact line, you are deemed the enemy. I
believe this is a product of social media. Maybe this is why the Russians, and
the corporation and the powers that be know that they can control us by
mirroring, splintering, and then leading us towards a separation that serves their
own ends. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I’m done with the echo chamber. I’m done with suggested
news. I’m done with reading the internet. My eyes will read paper and my
fingers will turn pages rather than swiping a cracked glass screen. I want to
learn more than what I know. I want to hear the other side. I want dissent, and
I want to discuss and argue and think and feel without the label of “enemy.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Reason #4: There’s an Alternative to the Unnatural Matrix<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We are plugged in, almost constantly. For the last 8 years,
I’ve spent nearly every bedtime and sunrise on social media. I’m drawn to it. I’ve
wasted dinners with my family. I’ve wasted travel and time with my wife and
playing with my children in order to compulsively check, brag, compare, and
judge on social media. But it isn’t the real world. In the real world there are
stars and heavens. We have cool breezes. We have music. Most people are good,
kind and honest. We do not live in a world of predators. We live in a world of
love, but the magnifying glass is focused on evil. Media tells us that we live
in a pool of hate, but I believe if I disconnect and judge this universe by the
character of the people I interact with on a daily basis, I will see the truth.
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Yes, there will always be bad guys, but I want to truly see
the accurate representation instead of believing I live in a poisoned world
with no hope. At the very least, I want to disconnect from the system that is
thinking for me by telling me what is what. I want to think for myself. I want
to feed my mind with that of my choosing rather than listen to the noise of
2000 “friends.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Stop Digging<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When we find ourselves in a hole, the best thing to do is
stop digging. In 8 years, social media has not made me a happy person. I feel
more lonely. I feel more jealous. I feel close friends and family slipping
away. I feel the “connectedness” promised by Facebook turned out to be superficial
friendship with a side dish of isolation. I want connection and true
friendship, even if it is with 5 humans and not 5000. I want to call and talk
to my family instead of “liking” a post or wishing a Happy Birthday mindlessly
on a website. I want debate for the purpose of learning rather than winning. I
want the tested and true real life rather than this brave new world of
disconnection, head sunken down, thumbs tapping away as the real friends,
family and experience in front of me passes by. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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It's been a long time. I've been busy with new projects, new shows, and new business. I'm sure you've been busy too, but my stats say that every now and again there are 90-200 visitors to this site on a random day so I know you miss me. This is no doubt attributable to blog that went viral in 2008 on the topic of circumcision, entitled, <a href="http://www.thedaddyexperience.com/2008/07/just-to-be-fair-im-circumcised.html" target="_blank">"Just to Be Fair, I'm Circumcised."</a> Thank you for being so interested in this penis piece! My new venture promises to bring you even more tasteful penis discussions.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDdnJSzcpPohI7htoYKDPnmBmBBXGxRAVgHxAF8Z9YoChah_sfMcJxZiAkZVdGyJNSEITDX6Jb0hivKYVumgnswZdUTyTYFCZF6R12L9vRK6wL6ckeuU4DCpSphRQrVebvYbMyp6IEYllC/s1600/_DSC0417.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="237" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDdnJSzcpPohI7htoYKDPnmBmBBXGxRAVgHxAF8Z9YoChah_sfMcJxZiAkZVdGyJNSEITDX6Jb0hivKYVumgnswZdUTyTYFCZF6R12L9vRK6wL6ckeuU4DCpSphRQrVebvYbMyp6IEYllC/s320/_DSC0417.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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<br /></div>
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While the Daddy Experience was an amazing launching pad for my writing, it was only the beginning. My wife, Nicole and I have combined our talents and skills and efforts to create the comedy podcast and blog, <a href="http://www.thelostparents.com/">www.TheLostParents.com</a>. We will discuss specific issues that we are facing regarding parenting, business ownership, and life from the perspective of parents who took off from home to move 3000 miles away, quit jobs, have more kids, and find a way to survive. And there will be penis. At least one more. And he's a boy. And he won't be circumcised.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
See you at <a href="http://www.thelostparents.com/" target="_blank">TheLostParents.com!</a></div>
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<br /></div>
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<a href="https://soundcloud.com/user-64206113/sets/the-lost-parents" target="_blank">Click Here for Soundcloud Podcast</a></div>
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I drop Jackson off at school every morning and pick him up every afternoon. It's weird for a stay-at-home Dad. When you are out and about, other moms look at you like, "Aww, he's a super hero Dad." When they see you drop off and pick up everyday, they look at you like, "Oh, I get it...he's unemployed."<br />
<br /></div>
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The other day, I read about a Dad who asked another mother about a play date, and she reported him to the school for hitting on her. This made me even more hyper aware of the creep aspects of being a misunderstood dad. Not only to they think I'm a loser, but they think I'm a predator loser.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I'm probably reading too much into it, and the stories that we tell ourselves are always worse than reality. BUT, nothing is more honest than the reaction of a child...</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Jackson has a way of asking for things when he knows the likelihood of a denial is at a minimum. When I picked him up from school the other day, we found ourselves walking next to another child and his mother. Jackson asked, "Can we have a playmate?!?" My usual response would have been, "Let's ask Mommy" followed by a toy or snack to serve as a distraction in the hopes that he would forget the question altogether. But the other mommy answered immediately, "Sure!" So, I told her that the next day I would bring in my info so we could make the arrangements.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
The next time I saw the mom, I gave her an index card with my number, email, and Nicole's number also, in an attempt to reduce the "creep factor." Without missing a beat, her son (not remembering me from the day before) says, "Who are you?" Those were the words he used. HOWEVER, his tonality and facial muscles were clearly communicating, "WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU TO GIVE MY MOM YOUR INFO, YOU PREDATORY LOSER?!?" </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I have no doubt that this was brought up at their dinner table that night. The little guy stood up for his mother's honor. He made sure to take the alpha male role in dad's stead. And at age 5, he clearly put me in my place. "I'm Jackson's Dad." He then said, "Oh, OK" ...but his untrusting face remained as though it was chiseled from stone.</div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
It hasn’t rained since May (in San Diego) and my housing dilemma
is working itself out. We might be
homeowners within a month! Our student
loans are completely paid off. We bought
a new car. The dog’s vagina healed
wonderfully…but she has a UTI again…within 3-months…and I’m feeling a little
lost, unproductive…and downright useless.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Look, it can’t all be peaches and cream (mmmmmmm….creeeeam…*drool*). Some things are great; <b><i>extremely fantastic</i></b>
especially when compared to mothers and children gasping for air. Some things suck. The things that suck are mostly in my head,
which means I need a) a lobotomy, b) a 24-hour marijuana vapor hook up, c)
perspective. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The answer is clearly “C.” (with maybe just a little bit of “B”). I want to perform more. I want to write more. I want to make some more money doing the
things that I love and support Nicole to do the same. All of this is within reach, and I just have
to deal with the little hands and arms pulling on me as I r e a c h…
But, again, those little arms are healthy and my house is filled with
love, and the world if a fucking nightmare, so I have to realize that here in
our little oasis in southern California, we are super lucky.<o:p></o:p></div>
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</script></div>Tommy Galanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00724154249560715612noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9021094789918063530.post-60718717285853044012013-06-24T09:55:00.000-07:002013-06-24T09:55:26.525-07:00Interesting Week...<div style="text-align: center;">
It's been an interesting week. This happened....</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcXGwptMm-p8I0Sbv51Eqeguo1P8rjXER-TsR-UpCPhyphenhyphenDt18Jea2ny9wFDhycr5zHSZbLYcUA1ZHmKcMf6TNkJ7G5QlBFGzZlt2QrVKKWhCNJJvb1F3fWGarhyphenhyphengaKDkP7Oqq1m1rSLBnLA/s1600/Sandal+Socks.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="239" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcXGwptMm-p8I0Sbv51Eqeguo1P8rjXER-TsR-UpCPhyphenhyphenDt18Jea2ny9wFDhycr5zHSZbLYcUA1ZHmKcMf6TNkJ7G5QlBFGzZlt2QrVKKWhCNJJvb1F3fWGarhyphenhyphengaKDkP7Oqq1m1rSLBnLA/s320/Sandal+Socks.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I used to wonder how older men could go out of the house dress like this. Really?!? Socks with Sandals! But I get it now. This is what happens when we finally give up. I'm done attracting anything female into my tractor beam. From this point on, clothing, both in and out of the house will be for utility purposes. And long white tube socks keep baby hands from pulling out daddy leg hair.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
This happened too...</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGpjxynxevGgujlbjWVp1rOZJ9RlodBxyqUCkUuORx-zb15Si4Wy-nXxzYQC-KZYJSZcpaxIKnphhEcmrUHGBny1-qt5o1-XpxDlUiSj8XfA640VqIGnWhgv7EnuOG8tcikFoS_HOGLKWP/s1600/photo+3.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGpjxynxevGgujlbjWVp1rOZJ9RlodBxyqUCkUuORx-zb15Si4Wy-nXxzYQC-KZYJSZcpaxIKnphhEcmrUHGBny1-qt5o1-XpxDlUiSj8XfA640VqIGnWhgv7EnuOG8tcikFoS_HOGLKWP/s320/photo+3.JPG" width="239" /></a></div>
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<br /></div>
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Nicole gave birth to a 5 year old wearing tap shoes? No. We attended a dance recital where we knew absolutely nobody. No doubt many of you assume Nicole dragged me to this to show me how cute little girls can be. However, this was actually my doing. While looking for space to teach improv in San Diego, I was introduced to this dance company and they are actually really really good. We only stayed for the first half because my lovely and wonderful children reminded me why I don't want to raise any more lovely and wonderful children.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
But let's not forget about this...</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZgN6t5RmPfLeMD1wylpFH4E3mQwwABzJh9v8m0WEP9LvzW_CIRIpIWlXvVoZOYdCjXwCqkzqAUgm4afS-1JShpzQIUqGRGe2CPfgLgtd4Nm0rr6u_1jc6D_exlASLOCO0zJ7slnWZKs8m/s1600/photo+1.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZgN6t5RmPfLeMD1wylpFH4E3mQwwABzJh9v8m0WEP9LvzW_CIRIpIWlXvVoZOYdCjXwCqkzqAUgm4afS-1JShpzQIUqGRGe2CPfgLgtd4Nm0rr6u_1jc6D_exlASLOCO0zJ7slnWZKs8m/s320/photo+1.JPG" width="239" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
This is officially how I want to die if I get a choice in the matter. Death by Bacon, and Chocolate, and Beer...all mixed together. The San Diego County Fair is a fantastic place to laugh at the part of your brain that signals a full belly. This was almost a week ago, and my sweat is still a little thicker than normal.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
This happened at the fair as well...</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_stCcsz-W1LIRhR8mCmrbhe-isZG0RNuWbaAPgkKZPd7XxINHkn_lskU8vPojMZTC-XkzK3EluBVi3moYhTJ7CP-Wsg-LEV_W-YG26UkspAWhu5D2RBzIT9kXpFewijkzJPDSgwSjkzxH/s1600/photo+1-1.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_stCcsz-W1LIRhR8mCmrbhe-isZG0RNuWbaAPgkKZPd7XxINHkn_lskU8vPojMZTC-XkzK3EluBVi3moYhTJ7CP-Wsg-LEV_W-YG26UkspAWhu5D2RBzIT9kXpFewijkzJPDSgwSjkzxH/s320/photo+1-1.JPG" width="239" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;">
The next time you find yourself chest strapped to a 10 month old in a baby bjorn at a fair that doesn't have rides for 10 month old babies, simply park yourself in front of the house of glass and mirrors and wait. Within moments you will be gleefully entertained that the massive number of mindless children who smash their little faces into the walls of this gem...repeatedly. You would think that they would learn, but most collied so hard on the first impact, it must damage the area of the brain responsible for sort term memory.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
And Finally...This!</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7gFy5TgL8yDkcPDvBYeIk-lKqAHKrc-8PP1hjv1wAWp78hVOTfIZkDFcWPlML8VoDAhsiv2o1ytv889-a8xabu2PpKYcKEcpOqJIdT5utpaNlydur6-KMHxJy5dF0SlWB6u8gI3oTNZPM/s1600/Beef+Chocolate.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7gFy5TgL8yDkcPDvBYeIk-lKqAHKrc-8PP1hjv1wAWp78hVOTfIZkDFcWPlML8VoDAhsiv2o1ytv889-a8xabu2PpKYcKEcpOqJIdT5utpaNlydur6-KMHxJy5dF0SlWB6u8gI3oTNZPM/s320/Beef+Chocolate.JPG" width="239" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I don't know what else needs to be said. My life just feels a little more complete. Thank you Wild Ophelia! </div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i>Cop: </i></b><i>Where are you coming from tonight?<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i>Me:</i></b><i> A show at The Cherry Lane Theater.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i>Cop:</i></b><i> What show?<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i>Me:</i></b><i> FUCT<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i>Cop:</i></b><i> Alright son, license and registration…<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In June of 2008, I agreed to not perform in a FUCT run
because Nicole’s due date was imminent and we didn’t want it to interfere with
the birth of our first son. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Thursday, the 12<sup>th</sup> was the first night of the
performance. George Wendt was in the
audience. I got to serve him his first
beer at his first FUCT show. A very
pregnant Nicole was even in the audience with me. FUCT was great. I was about to have a baby. Norm was drinking a beer in my audience. Everything was awesome. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.fuctnyc.com/" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="230" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjht0C1KpBMmb0lqxHRbp3mwRMJwra7FOuQNL5FRJgPuO20Dj8HeQab41OneYv8hHyCB2Mvf0eMa4dJyocCf_RE6dG5FUT0bc4EWrsAK3T_ACLCzIejUoDefr9G0QXXpbxeCnI38NqgknxH/s320/FUCT_Logo_(White_on_Black).jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
The following night was Friday, and the second night of the
show. I attended this performance
without Nicole, and afterwards, I went to Barrow’s Pub for our usual post-show
party. Around 2:30am, it was time to
call it a night. My brother, Michael was
with me and as we took off, southbound traffic on 7<sup>th</sup> Avenue was
moving surprisingly slow. Before too
long, it was obvious that the lanes were narrowing, and the side streets were
closed. Of course…a DWI stop.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I was drinking that night; a few beers at the show, and at
least one or two at the bar. I also
smoked some pot, and while I don’t specifically remember smoking, I don’t
specifically remember a time when I didn’t smoke pot after a FUCT show. Thankfully, when I left the bar I did NOT
take the final shot of Jack Daniels that was being toasted. The BAC limits in New York are extremely low,
so even though I wasn’t “drunk,” I don’t know if I could have passed a
breathalyzer test.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHyukEHG8XwSVJw-Euu3tBu9Wyl1WB6pSDrHWzK7fuQgrbcliCTkFHGvWi_8x6Dqdw8CE_iZk5Em_I02yEA5V6ofUOqjHO6NdOPKl2aO-qmgEs30qkZRvScQwiiGnnYbDO2gvcMAiUEW44/s1600/Screen+Shot+2013-06-13+at+10.38.06+AM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="251" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHyukEHG8XwSVJw-Euu3tBu9Wyl1WB6pSDrHWzK7fuQgrbcliCTkFHGvWi_8x6Dqdw8CE_iZk5Em_I02yEA5V6ofUOqjHO6NdOPKl2aO-qmgEs30qkZRvScQwiiGnnYbDO2gvcMAiUEW44/s320/Screen+Shot+2013-06-13+at+10.38.06+AM.png" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My attempt to answer the officer’s questions without
breathing in his face was even more difficult since he positioned his head
through my car window and directly in line with my nose and mouth.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i>Cop:</i></b><i> Where are you coming from tonight?<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
(Great, I know the answer to this one…)<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i>Me:</i></b><i> A show at The Cherry Lane Theater.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i>Cop:</i></b><i> What show?<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
(OMG…do I lie? Do I say
“FUCT,” and shock his nervous system with a name that sounds like one of the most
vulgar curses in the English language.
If I lie, what if he asks a follow up question? I’ll go with the truth and just explain that
it is not really a curse because it is spelled with a “T”…)<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i>Me: </i></b><i>FUCT<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
(I did it. The truth
will make you free…or…)<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i>Cop:</i></b><i> Alright son, license and registration…<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
(Noooooooooooooo…The officer was leaning through the window
and head is practically on my lap. There
was no way that he couldn’t smell the booze on my breath or the “bat and dugout”
that I so carefully tossed between the car seats. I’ve been figured out.)<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My heart started racing as I felt the adrenal glands crank
into over-drive. My legs began to
involuntarily shake and the sweat from my brow was at the critical point of
beading and running down my cheek. I
turned towards my right pocket, take out my wallet, and open it. I pinch my NYS driver’s license by the corner,
and that’s when it happens…<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Just as I’m sliding my driver’s license out of the wallet
flap, I hear:<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i>Cop:</i></b><i> “OK, son, move
along.”<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i>Me:</i></b><i> “Thank you Officer”<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It was just after 3am on Friday night, and I narrowly
escaped spending the weekend in jail.
When I arrived home, I rolled into bed around 4am. I was wiped out. The mix of alcohol, THC and adrenaline was
still pumping through me, and before long, I passed out hard. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
7am - Nicole woke me up…her water broke. (Two weeks early). “Are you sure you didn’t just pee the bed?” I
asked. Thinking back over certain times
of my life, this is one of the moments that make me wonder why she hasn’t left
me (yet).<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Noon – Jackson was born.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfOG9ySPovU1gBh7SKM2RqEYylU_p1cL0O9XKhoti2Zcxb89fUhVonsZfauys-CBixIyFH98kHnhxSRvC7HFiZ9ABK0JoQYS2VuGl8BInIfGjf4C9ogmwEFe6R2VgqS9hFssEttSwb6HUK/s1600/Dad+and+Jack+1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfOG9ySPovU1gBh7SKM2RqEYylU_p1cL0O9XKhoti2Zcxb89fUhVonsZfauys-CBixIyFH98kHnhxSRvC7HFiZ9ABK0JoQYS2VuGl8BInIfGjf4C9ogmwEFe6R2VgqS9hFssEttSwb6HUK/s1600/Dad+and+Jack+1.jpg" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
If I was arrested the night before, Nicole would have dealt
with labor without me. I would have
missed my first son’s birth. Only on the
third day of his life would Jackson and I meet as he was brought home from the
hospital and me from lockup. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I continued to drink during 2008, but stopped cold turkey on
New Years, 2009. For 14 months, I
remained booze free. In May 2008, I
started again in the Dominican Republic while on vacation with Nicole and
Jackson. For over a year everything was
fine, but I decided again in 2011 to call it quits. After comparing my life, back-to-back with
sobriety and with drunkenness, I realized that my family and I are happier and
healthier when alcohol isn’t part of the equation. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Tomorrow is Jackson’s 5<sup>th</sup> birthday and it’s been
a fantastic and rewarding 5-year run.
That terrible birth-eve is also 5 years old. To this day, I don’t
know why the cop let me go. Maybe he was
just testing me to see if I would fumble for my ID. Maybe he was new and had self-doubt. Maybe, he had no sense of smell from a
childhood trauma. Nevertheless, I was
blessed/lucky to avoid the consequences of my stupidity. There were a few more “wake-up calls,” but eventually,
I woke up and called it quits. In a
month, on July 8, 2013, I will celebrate the 2-year mark, alcohol free, and
drunk only on fatherhood.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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</script></div>Tommy Galanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00724154249560715612noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9021094789918063530.post-58762002802550575352013-06-10T14:52:00.000-07:002013-06-10T14:52:23.557-07:00Improv is Family
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMGR9CU-EnGSIqkL-DHpYdtLdUoQ-ZpBsgm0EF0kgImM1i93WzYTPq7IRcjQzl_oOePA4hrl4sycE6-5Ee4UkjGgzWdNktPzfGNvtVj9S-DsKHDzK_-x5bsS5mDJw61K5X1IQU1Rm0YkIA/s1600/FCI+logo.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="193" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMGR9CU-EnGSIqkL-DHpYdtLdUoQ-ZpBsgm0EF0kgImM1i93WzYTPq7IRcjQzl_oOePA4hrl4sycE6-5Ee4UkjGgzWdNktPzfGNvtVj9S-DsKHDzK_-x5bsS5mDJw61K5X1IQU1Rm0YkIA/s200/FCI+logo.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
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On Friday, I was invited to the lease signing party for San
Diego’s <a href="http://www.finestcityimprov.com/" target="_blank">Finest City Improv</a>. At the end
of August they will launch a new era of long-form improv in San Diego, and I’m
thrilled to collaborate and partner with this fantastic group of artists. At the beginning of the party, I knew only
about 2 or 3 guests, but at the end I met everyone and the connection was immediate.
They opened up to me as though we were long distance relatives who just hadn’t
yet met. A family, with the last name “improv.”
Very excited that my adventure has
crossed paths with FCI’s path, and I’m looking forward to the next chapter…</div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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(For my performer/improviser/comedian friends: You will have
a home and a stage here with warm, welcoming, and talented players. <a href="https://www.facebook.com/FinestCityImprov?fref=ts" target="_blank">Follow on Facebook</a>, make sure to venture a bit further south when
you visit the west coast, and let’s play and make San Diego laugh! Love and miss you all!!!) <o:p></o:p></div>
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</script></div>Tommy Galanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00724154249560715612noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9021094789918063530.post-19301006885706042452013-06-07T11:00:00.000-07:002013-06-07T11:00:04.648-07:00Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4-LhfQRHjwZapThOK5gv4_OmoZJhyk5eRI0lilwbxLjlC8CZhPuOyXz-O3pO1T0_dxj263b7jbFhOo1P1edFPxodlWWT_owxAx8HSPFu68XCgeX5waYR0GyJntiEfufNvpj7AveoIC8gb/s1600/New+Headshot+NEeded.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4-LhfQRHjwZapThOK5gv4_OmoZJhyk5eRI0lilwbxLjlC8CZhPuOyXz-O3pO1T0_dxj263b7jbFhOo1P1edFPxodlWWT_owxAx8HSPFu68XCgeX5waYR0GyJntiEfufNvpj7AveoIC8gb/s320/New+Headshot+NEeded.jpg" /></a></div>
Over my life, I’ve enjoyed a canvas that is my face and head. In August 2012, I started growing a beard to carve into a 2012 <a href="http://us.movember.com/" target="_blank">Movember</a> “stache.” <a href="http://us.movember.com/" target="_blank">Movember</a>, for those who don’t know, is an annual event where men grow mustaches to raise awareness of men’s heath issues. This year was a bit different. I started two months early in clear violation of the rules, and then in November, I didn’t shave the beard or carve out the mustache. Instead, it just kept growing. By April there was a nest on my face, and I loved it. I might have been the only one.<br />
<br />
When we decided to move to San Diego, I felt that it was time for another symbolic change. I shaved off the beard and remembered how little my chin and neck appear without an avalanche of hair pouring off my cheeks. It was nice to have a clean-shaven face. I could leave New York the same way that I entered, clean-shaven (not through my mother’s vagina). And then, the week of April 11th, my friends and family said “goodbye” to the face they met many years ago.<br />
<br />
Another reason I grew the beard back in New York was because of the winter. It was cold. This particular year, I was working on roofing jobs to make ends meet, and as the autumn and winter slipped in, the beard served a purpose. However, in my new climate of San Diego, there is little need for a mountain man beard. We don’t get snow. The coldest winter temps in the dead of night are only in the 40—50 degree range. Aside from pretending that I’m a youthful trendy hipster, the beard serves no purpose other than my own amusement and to scare children (which by the way is a totally valid reason and chances are the #1 reason if I ever grow it back).<br />
<br />
While the San Diego mercury doesn’t plummet like the northeast, we do have abundant, Vitamin D producing, good time inspiring, trade in your boots for sandals sunshine. And with sunshine comes sunburn, and lots of it. With a baldhead that is almost exclusively pointed towards the heavens, I’m now considering letting my hair grow back in to save the thin skin on my noggin. It will be thinning. It will be grey. It will be glorious. Maybe I’ll grow the beard back too. I wonder what I will look like then…hmmmm
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<b><i>I need your advice…<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSsbKqGfEtHlzBYptDFcRj1oeRtXOMEXqqFIiCJ4Cc2cMlX5ySfjpSUFuj5GgvAebVJ0XMvvEnnLei5XJhKyr-3ZcygBEbNSCPgroHJw1o1fd0tvvqP3laiRErPtEBxZdmCemX51nYnLUy/s1600/Pool+Plea+Photo.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSsbKqGfEtHlzBYptDFcRj1oeRtXOMEXqqFIiCJ4Cc2cMlX5ySfjpSUFuj5GgvAebVJ0XMvvEnnLei5XJhKyr-3ZcygBEbNSCPgroHJw1o1fd0tvvqP3laiRErPtEBxZdmCemX51nYnLUy/s320/Pool+Plea+Photo.JPG" width="239" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This Child Will Not Swim Again w/o Your Help</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I’m a pacifist. There
is a classic beach story about my brother and me. I was playing with my toys and an older boy
came over to play. He quickly took my
toys as his own and left. While I tried
to negotiate a fair “let’s play together” deal, my younger, 3-year-old brother,
Joey confronted the bully, punched him in the gut, and took back the booty.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
This afternoon, I received an email for the property manager
of my condo. The sum and substance was
“go fuck yourself.” It all starts with
Trulia. In February, we started looking
for places to live and Nicole stumbled across our apartment in Rancho
Bernardo. Right price, right schools,
right size, price, pool, tennis courts, golf course view, and safe and
clean. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
When we arrived, we dealt with a laundry list of headaches
(<a href="http://www.thedaddyexperience.com/2013/06/vaginaplasty-and-frozen-yogurt.html" target="_blank">Vaginaplasty and Frozen Yogurt</a>). Part of
the headaches was a failure to provide the passes to the pool and tennis
courts. Finally, after 3 weeks, we got
out passes. Earlier this week, while
entering the pool, we were informed by a club employee that our membership was
only unlimited for the first 3 month, and that moving forward we only have
6-pool passes, or we have to pay an additional $130 for the year. The landlord decided to not pay the pool bill in full, which gives up only basic access, which is -passes per year. I know that $130 isn’t that much for a year,
but the principle of renting an apartment with a “pool” to just find out later
that it is “3-months of pool and 6-pool passes for the next 9 months” seemed a
bit deceptive.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
So, I got in touch with the property manager, and he got in
touch with the owner, and the owner gave the property manager a message, and
the message was passed to me…”go fuck yourself” <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><i>Like that day on the beach, I need your pseudo little brother
assistance. Please let me know how you
would handle this…small claims? Suck it up? Complain about every little detail
in the apartment? Cry? Please let me know, because while I’ve sent
some strongly worded emails, I’m not set on the next move.
<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<!--EndFragment--><div class="blogger-post-footer"><script type="text/javascript">
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</script></div>Tommy Galanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00724154249560715612noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9021094789918063530.post-52741047295386117572013-06-03T11:53:00.000-07:002013-06-06T14:30:37.419-07:00Visitor Log and Forecast – June 1, 2013
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When we first told our family that we were moving to San
Diego they were happy until they realized we were serious…then came the grieving
process including the “bargaining” stage.
This is when family and friends explained that they would not visit, and
therefore we should not move. Well, the
visitor bubble has been breached and they are starting to flow. </div>
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<br /></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7FXlKlEdqLA3MccemOx3iVlMAQh0R0pYR8kjJMnRjrVsTMvgUMWfOnMJtr05WOcyCeYPSYHShBe9mpzYz7ve2COqjVYUm3DsbED136_U6wPxzFQ1jmKAPePW-WWX-faHfcaVfkNdRi5Fu/s1600/Mom+and+Louie+SD.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7FXlKlEdqLA3MccemOx3iVlMAQh0R0pYR8kjJMnRjrVsTMvgUMWfOnMJtr05WOcyCeYPSYHShBe9mpzYz7ve2COqjVYUm3DsbED136_U6wPxzFQ1jmKAPePW-WWX-faHfcaVfkNdRi5Fu/s320/Mom+and+Louie+SD.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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The following is a list of the planned trips
over the next few months. Who wouldn’t
want to visit beautiful San Diego, again and again and again and …?<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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My parents and my sister left this morning from a 1-week
visit to our new home in San Diego. My
mom will be back for her next visit in exactly 6-weeks. However, in 11 days my mom’s sister, my aunt
(better known as “Auntie”) will be here for her week visit from the 12<sup>th</sup>
to the 19<sup>th</sup> of June. Three
weeks after Auntie leaves is when Mom comes back. </div>
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<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
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When mom is done with her second visit in
July, we will have a whole week off before my mother-in-law and sister-in-law
join us from August 1<sup>st</sup> to August 6<sup>th</sup>. Less than 24 hours after they take off, my
father lands. He will stay with us for 2
weeks. And then, it’s over…but only for
6 weeks when mom returns with her mother, Aggie (my grandmother and my kids’
“Nana”). <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIvLl9OD4TI0FkW_uzWSiBbHD3wUarW8QZHXM-Bs82DCovXeOcXBi9MYfCSzkwdkmrS6x9MwJKNHQ0ix99OkuDHARZ32ZzUFZXR1xGkpmIfC7_EuCii23LJJqRg7H-a3RNwQDl9EHmyzqo/s1600/Mom+and+Jack+TP+SD.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIvLl9OD4TI0FkW_uzWSiBbHD3wUarW8QZHXM-Bs82DCovXeOcXBi9MYfCSzkwdkmrS6x9MwJKNHQ0ix99OkuDHARZ32ZzUFZXR1xGkpmIfC7_EuCii23LJJqRg7H-a3RNwQDl9EHmyzqo/s320/Mom+and+Jack+TP+SD.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
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In our first 6 months, we have visitors here for 2 months,
or 1/3 of the time that we are here. It’s
as if we are keeping the vacation warm as people come back and forth. We didn’t move…we bought a bed and breakfast
(and we love it…the more family, the better).<o:p></o:p></div>
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</script></div>Tommy Galanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00724154249560715612noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9021094789918063530.post-18049690200184585972013-06-02T22:10:00.000-07:002013-06-06T15:05:45.829-07:00Vaginaplasty and Frozen Yogurt<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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The other day, I received an email from a woman who was
interested in helping me write my blog.
It was a very generous offer, but more a “wake up call” than anything
else. I explained that it might seem a
little weird to have a guest writer update the blog that I keep as a memoir for
my kids. While she can probably write
Shakespearean rings around me, the genuineness of the context may be lost.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Nevertheless, we are in San Diego, it’s been almost 5 weeks,
and I haven’t composed a single letter since March. Time to write.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Here is a list of things that happened over the last 5-weeks
to get you back up to speed:<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<ul>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">We arrive;</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Ellis decides he doesn’t want to sleep in his
crib, or our bed, or at all;</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">It is freezing because we don’t know how to use
the AC and it is set for 22 degrees;</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">There is zero water pressure;</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">It rains for three days – IN SAN DIEGO!</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">The kids shower comes off the wall when you
adjust the water because the pipes were never strapped to inside of the wall;</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Symbol; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">The refrigerator is broken and the breast milk
that we had special dry-ice shipped from NY is quickly defrosting, requiring us
to buy dry ice and ice for days;</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">The garbage disposal just hums…that’s it;</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">The dog, who suffered from a serious Urinary
Tract Infection, goes to her follow-up vet appointment, and is diagnosed with a
recessed vulva, requiring a vulvaplasty (vagina surgery to remove the hood from
her crotch);</span></li>
</ul>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_fS8_zQqbDCkzIIYjr6vPxxsTSD0rBZyATFyIWH7f4CO4uAeIGB6HPfUQLdM7QnDr5XFTiiJ0JxgHPPmczkU7ed8vpzY8b9nOugVztvrwVI51ww0upI9_K7R_9IiMtdT1ZJl6n6pHZSVa/s1600/Dog+Shame.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_fS8_zQqbDCkzIIYjr6vPxxsTSD0rBZyATFyIWH7f4CO4uAeIGB6HPfUQLdM7QnDr5XFTiiJ0JxgHPPmczkU7ed8vpzY8b9nOugVztvrwVI51ww0upI9_K7R_9IiMtdT1ZJl6n6pHZSVa/s320/Dog+Shame.JPG" width="239" /></a></div>
<ul>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">I fail my driver’s written test, as a result of
under-studying and a crying child hanging on my leg;</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Nicole’s new employer lied to her about her
hours, which severely restricts my ability to work;</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">We receive an unusual email from our realtor
that shows our current apartment as a new listing;</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">A day later it is adjusted…to a short sale;</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">This bears repeating – within 2 weeks of moving
into our apartment, it is being sold because our landlord is in a financial
hardship;</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">The dog pees on the couch, because now, after
her vagina surgery, she is incontinent…..I get angry, time her out in the
bathroom, and when I kick the door open, I break my toe;</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">We don’t have medical insurance because when you
are in between jobs in America, good luck!</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">At least you get the action when the dice rolls…will I make it 3 months
without breaking a bone…oh wait, I already broke my toe…great;</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">San Diego water is on the top 25 most polluted,
so we have to contract a water delivery service because we live in a dystopic
society where the “haves” buy clean water and the “have-nots” grow tails;</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">After 4 weeks, we get the HOA rules…from 1992.</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"> </span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">And no dogs over 30 pounds are permitted, and
unfortunately, Bella’s vagina hood didn’t weigh 35 pounds.</span></li>
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<br />
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<br /></div>
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But, even after all that (and we are sure there is more on
the way) we are happy. Aside from the 3
days of rain, the weather is amazing. Jackson
is in karate. Ellis is back on a
routine, and Nicole and I found a great little frozen yogurt shop (<a href="http://www.goldenspoon.com/locations/california/golden-spoon-rancho-bernardo/" target="_blank">Golden Spoon in Rancho Bernardo</a>) within walking distance.
Things are good and getting better, and there really isn’t anything that
can’t be cured with toffee-frozen yogurt with chocolate cake batter cookie
dough ice cream….anything, except maybe dog vagina surgery. <o:p></o:p></div>
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</script></div>Tommy Galanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00724154249560715612noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9021094789918063530.post-36117760240835714482013-06-01T13:10:00.000-07:002013-06-01T13:10:20.304-07:00nEw ViEw.........aNd NeW CoNtEnT oN tHe WaY!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPfX8VN0rS3Qhs6kpbKo3Xu5zII_7PaREVX5WH2o2J7vSatQcq02t_7wT96o8_Tixe-8tDiBiZ6Ea83GrwDHNPvFFx-u3lQj4j2GuzUhipzC_6dyq8O-d1LiLoNm7ovvKJt5usBXk0j7Z0/s1600/New+Content+Photo+2.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPfX8VN0rS3Qhs6kpbKo3Xu5zII_7PaREVX5WH2o2J7vSatQcq02t_7wT96o8_Tixe-8tDiBiZ6Ea83GrwDHNPvFFx-u3lQj4j2GuzUhipzC_6dyq8O-d1LiLoNm7ovvKJt5usBXk0j7Z0/s1600/New+Content+Photo+2.JPG" /></a></div>
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</script></div>Tommy Galanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00724154249560715612noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9021094789918063530.post-49700260363215917952013-03-14T07:39:00.000-07:002013-03-14T07:39:28.896-07:00Changes
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It’s no surprise that I make impulse decisions. In February 2003, in the middle of a
blizzard, on the night before my first arbitration as a self-employed attorney,
I jumped off a roof and sprained both of my ankles. My first real estate purchase was the very
first apartment that I saw. “Let’s get
married.” “Let’s adopt a dog.” “Let’s have a baby.” “Let’s have two.” Not a tremendous amount of thought or
planning in any of these decisions. I
don’t necessarily recommend this strategy, but I know that I’m the type of
person that might talk myself out of a plan if I over think it. My fear of a boring life far outweighs my
fear of change and adventure.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Moving away from New York, my family, and my home of 35
years was one of the most planned decisions of my life that almost never
happened. The itch began during Spring
Break, 1999. Amsterdam was the first
trip overseas by myself. All I had was a
round-trip ticket. No family. No travel guidebook. No plan.
For 10 days, we wandered. The
only map was folded in my pocket and only used at the end of the day to find
our way back to our hostel. This was one
of the most liberating feelings of my life.
Years later the theory of improvisation would clarify and add a
philosophy to my 10-day experience of freedom and life happening in the moment.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Over the next 14 years, my life would change in countless
ways. Relationship, career, spiritual
shifts, marital status, moves, career change, and family additions all
contributed to forming who I am today.
However, the decade and a half of life changes all happened in the
constant of New York. Nicole and I love
to travel, and we’ve explored Canada, Prague, Budapest, Vienna, Bratislava,
Slovakia, Krakow, Dominican Republic, Aruba, Costa Rica, and state after state
of “escape the cold” southern weather.
With every trip, the same pattern persists; excitement followed by
curious exploring, followed by daydreaming, and then the inevitable
disappointment of a return to reality.
After most trips, and sometimes during, our keyboards would get an extra
workout as we surfed the real estate and job listings wondering if this would
be our inspiration to finally set sail.
Year after year, trip after trip, our hope diminished as the gravity of
New York continued to grow stronger…and then, two weeks ago, the universe
rolled out a red carpet.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">San Diego was the first place in the U.S. that I wanted to
move after I graduated from college. I
was only there as a child, but the promise of perfect beach weather and a
cross-country adventure were enough to ignite my 21-year-old mind. Instead, I listened to the “voice of reason”
that I’ve come to learn is the voice of fear.
I took the “safe” route and went to law school. I knew this would make my family happy and
proud, and making a lot of money sounded like a ticket to anywhere. What I received was a sentence to more
entanglement, and the gravity grew stronger.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Three years ago, after much self-negotiation and detangling,
I sold my law firm to focus on my place in the world of comedy. This leap would change my entire worldview,
because when I landed, it was in the world of improv at The Peoples Improv
Theater in NYC. This was the perfect
point of my life for improv. Not only
would I practice it as an art form, but the deeper improv philosophy made sense
to me in my life off the stage as well.
Day by day, one “yes” at a time, I lived moment to moment. I slowly let go of my judgmental mind. I followed the fear and didn’t let it
paralyze me. I accepted that fact that
change is not only natural, but also it is the only way we get anywhere.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7-PY_9pkrsR13jUpcswGBRjR6hjhiftx96BZeIH0Q9xs4NakkCFSav9Hk98rktoxAYvmz8hSeQBODkh6eD0Rs6-IpbdBV7EOe2O8zKEjuh6jsXpTt56U1nf1FA-o2hEjRPOVj8KTd7rNb/s1600/Screen+Shot+2013-03-14+at+10.37.10+AM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="152" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7-PY_9pkrsR13jUpcswGBRjR6hjhiftx96BZeIH0Q9xs4NakkCFSav9Hk98rktoxAYvmz8hSeQBODkh6eD0Rs6-IpbdBV7EOe2O8zKEjuh6jsXpTt56U1nf1FA-o2hEjRPOVj8KTd7rNb/s320/Screen+Shot+2013-03-14+at+10.37.10+AM.png" width="320" /></span></a><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Three weeks ago, Nicole found a job at a fertility clinic in
San Diego. They made an offer and she
accepted. Four weeks from today, we
leave New York. A few years ago, I would
freeze from all the fearful reasons why I shouldn’t leave…not anymore. I still feel the fear of change, but it means
something different now. I don’t know
what the future will bring. Maybe I’m
just seeing the world through rose-colored glasses, but what I do know is that
nothing is permanent except change, and I can keep changing, and I will…</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<!--EndFragment--><div class="blogger-post-footer"><script type="text/javascript">
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</script></div>Tommy Galanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00724154249560715612noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9021094789918063530.post-67283649561628253132013-01-24T08:41:00.001-08:002013-01-24T08:41:40.821-08:00Bubbles<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/F9LjNxZy-c0?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>
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</script></div>Tommy Galanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00724154249560715612noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9021094789918063530.post-8283286932159045082013-01-23T18:54:00.000-08:002013-01-23T18:54:00.895-08:00The News<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9B_npIBCRnFVF33Ttg1DEZ7pmTmuXE8YMs70VHOXQnKIXzX1hlBGybVK3sSO2sVnfREQ0-IKd3JrL5V8Nzv9jwYH6en9ShgXZw6T6lPN2vaJJOAZduG1EoA1CwsoIp-bSQe5vwt7kFQWz/s1600/Screen+Shot+2013-01-23+at+9.44.17+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="115" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9B_npIBCRnFVF33Ttg1DEZ7pmTmuXE8YMs70VHOXQnKIXzX1hlBGybVK3sSO2sVnfREQ0-IKd3JrL5V8Nzv9jwYH6en9ShgXZw6T6lPN2vaJJOAZduG1EoA1CwsoIp-bSQe5vwt7kFQWz/s200/Screen+Shot+2013-01-23+at+9.44.17+PM.png" width="200" /></a></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Jack</b>: Mom, the news is real, right?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Mom</b>: Yup</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Jack</b>: 'cuz Daddy thinks it's a bunch of crap.</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><script type="text/javascript">
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